Stuff shouldn't matter this much

I came home from work the other night to bizarre message on Facebook from a friend of mine, apologizing for something he wrote during a baseball discussion, that he was having a bad day and shouldn't have taken it out on me.

I literally had no idea what he was talking about.

Actually, I knew what he was talking about, as he was taking part in some trash-talking I was doing with my Red Sox fan friends over the previous week. They were all happy that the Red Sox beat the Yankees a few games, delaying when the Yankees clinched the wild card, and then when the Astros beat the Yankees in the wild card game.

I asked if they enjoyed their team's third last-place finish in four years, with one fluke World Series thrown in (which I called the "Jonas Gray" baseball season because Gray was a scrub who had one great moment). I told them the Yankees would have trouble making tee times after being eliminated because the Red Sox took all the good ones in July, and said the next thing Red Sox fans had to look forward to was Dave O'Brien welcoming them to spring training. (O'Brien replacing Don Orsillo as the Red Sox NESN play-by-play man is both an injustice and a serious thing around these parts, so the reference was hitting way below the belt.)

But even though I think very little of Red Sox fans as a whole, I knew this was just friends giving each other crab, and didn't find any of it offensive, certainly not offensive enough to block my friend (which I didn't know I had done) and then him unfriending me. Blocks were undone, friend status re-established and everythng is cool now.

Always remember folks ... it's only sports. Nothing wrong with throwing yourself into it, but it's not that important in the grand scheme of most of our lives.

* * * * *

Guys, we really need to get over ourselves.

Yes, Jessica Mendoza called the Astros-Yankees game. If you think she analyzes poorly, fine. Maybe she makes bad points, and doesn't know a lot about the game but tries to sound like a know-it-all ... wait, sorry , just had Harold Reynolds on the brain because I saw him do an ad for the MLB At Bat app, saying it's where he gets his information from. Personally, I'd hate to see how uninformed Reynolds is if he didn't have that app.

But I digress.

Jessica Mendoza doing color commentary isn't going to ruin a game because she's a woman, in spite of what some idiots were saying on Twitter, which Molly Knight did a fine job of recording. No one will have to give up his man card for listening, and it won't do any damage to any of the various parts of our anatomy.

I promise.

* * * * *

"First of all I hope your entire family contracts HIV."

The article on the health problems faced by ESPN NFL reporter Ed Werder's daughter and son-in-law is a tough read, even without what the idiot Patriots fan wrote to Werder after he defended Chris Mortensen's Deflategate reporting.

However, while I think Deflategate severed the last bit of the twine tethering most Patriots fans to both humility and rationality, I'm not writing this to pick on them, because who knows if this person even knew of Werder's family situation?

And it could have been a fan of any team who was upset about anything, because apparently, wishing disease on a person's family is what you do.

Just ... stop.

It's the Baseball Hall of Fame ... that should be enough

A shrine for everyone to see.

Kevin Paul Dupont has a story in the Boston Globe about the Baseball Hall of Fame, specifically that there's so much Red Sox-related stuff there that it justifies a Boston fan going. 

"It would be virtually impossible for a true Boston fan not to fall immediately into a state of awe and wonder over all the Hall’s offerings specific to the Sox. It blends the good and the bad, the splendor and the horror, including exhibit odes to such icons as Cy Young, Babe Ruth, and (Ted) Williams, along with other greats such as Carl Yastrzemski, Bobby Doerr, Carlton Fisk, Jim Rice, and others."

'“It’s not unusual to see adults walking around in baseball uniforms here,'’’ said (Hall of Fame president Jeff) Idelson, noting the Hall’s ability not only to turn back time, but turn adults into kids. 'It’s like you or me going out on Halloween and wearing our Carl Yastrzemski Little League uniform. Hey, this is the place to do it. This is the ultimate fantasy camp for baseball.'

Especially for those who wear their Red Sox."

People actually sent this stuff to Jackie Robinson

My first thought was that here was another parochial Boston piece, because it seems that nothing in this town matters at all unless there's some sort of local connection. Not that localizing a story isn't common in the media, and there is an obvious Red Sox connection with Pedro Martinez being enshrined in the Hall of Fame soon, but to my mind, there are some things that shouldn't require a local hook.

But then again, the night of the Kentucky Derby, it was one of the lead stories on a local newscast, not because it was the Kentucky Derby, but because a bunch of Patriots players partied there!

I met Nolan Ryan in the days before he was enshrined. You can imagine how I felt about this.

Then I had a second thought -- what if this wasn't yet another sign of Boston parochialism, but another sign of what we've become as sports fans?

We live in a world where more sports are available than ever before ... until the next thing that happens to make even more available. As a whole, this is, of course, awesome. However, I think a side effect is that you don't actually have to be a fan of a sport anymore; you can be a fan of a team.

Baseball seems especially vulnerable in this regard. Thanks to regional sports networks, which draw big ratings even as national ratings are low, and MLB.TV, most people can watch all 162 games of their favorite team (unless you're a Dodgers fan in Los Angeles, which is cruel, because you miss out on Vin Scully).

I even find myself mostly watching Yankees game these days, even with my online package.

Pete Rose is in the Hall of Fame, even if he's not. (And I think he will be eventually.)

But none of that should matter, whether you devour all the baseball you can or stick to one team. It's the Baseball Hall of Fame ... just go.

Do you know what you'll be doing an August weekend five years from now? He does.

Sitting around ... talking sports

I was at a family wedding the other day, and during the reception, my brother, cousin and I got talking about sports.

We talked about the Yankees (especially Alex Rodriguez and PEDs), the Buffalo Bills (my brother has to get used to liking Rex Ryan), college basketball (my cousin was a star basketball player in high school, his daughter has done some coaching, and her boyfriend is a young college assistant coach) and probably a couple other topics I can't think of right now.

This lasted 15 minutes or so, maybe a little longer, and ended when my cousin got up, smiled, patted me on the shoulder and said, "Listen to us, solving everything!"

Yup ... because that's what sports fans do.

John Oliver and I ... (not really) best buds

Mrs. Last Honest and I went to see John Oliver tonight in Boston. It was a brilliant show, and he told a joke that just laid waste to Patriots fans, which I'm cool with. As a sign of how good he was, it was far from the only joke that mocked Bostonians, and instead of cringing in horror or getting angry, because they were that kind of jokes, people laughed.

I had known either from a story or an interview that Oliver was a Liverpool fan, so it wasn't a surprise when he talked about going to his first game when he was a child, and then he moved on to visiting the Liverpool locker room at Yankee Stadium this summer, in a story that also involved fellow Liverpool fan Daniel Craig. (I won't spoil the story here, plus I could never be nearly that funny, but John Oliver, Yankee Stadium, James Bond and Liverpool is a whole lot of awesome in one place.)

My wife and I were sitting in the balcony, and as he was telling this ultimately fairly harrowing Liverpool story, I wasn't just laughing, but wishing I had a chance to talk to him not as successful comedian and riotous TV show host (him, obviously) and complete nobody (me, obviously) but as Liverpool fan to Liverpool fan.

Because as different as our lives are, we have that in common.

A very minor Derek Jeter memory

Several years ago, my wife, in-laws and I went on a tour of the old Yankee Stadium as part of some package where you saw the stadium, took a bus tour around the Bronx and ate lunch at some terrific Italian restaurant the name of which I do not remember.

Needless to say, my main interest was in the stadium tour, although the bus tour was surprisingly interesting, and I already mentioned the great lunch. Unlike a tour I later took in Phoenix where the perhaps-teenage tour guide pronounced Robin Yount's last name "Yunt," our guide at Yankee Stadium was a longtime employee who closed the tour by showing us his World Series ring, which appeared to basically be a convenient play to store lots of diamonds.

It was during the off-season, and a pretty raw day as I recall, but we hit all the important spots, most of which are standard on a tour -- the press box, the edge of the field, the dugout, some of the behind-the-scenes hallways -- and, of course, since it was Yankee Stadium, we went out to Monument Park.

And we went into the clubhouse. With the exception of Anfield, it was like any stadium or arena tour I've taken since, where you can see the clubhouse or locker room, but don't go much past the inside of the door and stand behind a rope. Our guide pointed out all the lockers we'd be interested in, including Thurman Munson's unused locker, and then pointed out Derek Jeter's.

If I remember correctly, it was on our left, in the middle of the group of lockers on that side of the room. Our guide informed us that until September call-ups required its use, the locker next to Jeter's was left vacant in order to hold his fan mail. One of our fellow tour-goers asked if Jeter answered all his fan mail, and our guide's answer is etched into my memory.

"It is a physical impossibility."

The dumbest stories in sports (Part 1)

Let me make this one really simple:

1. Jacoby Ellsbury was an important player for the Boston Red Sox.

2. Jacoby Ellsbury left the Boston Red Sox to join the New York Yankees, and took more money to do so.

3. Red Sox fans booed Jacoby Ellsbury last night when he came back to Boston for the first time.

This was always going to happen, and will happen every time Ellsbury goes back to Boston the rest of his career. (Here's to hoping Red Sox fans consult their dictionaries before it happens again.) There was no point speculating whether it was going to happen. There was no point commenting on it when it did happen.

There was actually no point in criticizing Red Sox fans who did it. I don't agree with it, and won't be booing Robinson Cano when I see the Yankees play the Mariners at Yankee Stadium next week, but all the criticism in the world won't change it.

And there will be no point in commenting on it when it happens in the future.

Who are the worst sports fans in America?

Because everything it about brackets this time of year, the folks at Deadspin are running a tournament to find "the bitchiest, most defensive fans in America." Although they have non-sports "regions" as well, I'm going to concentrate on the sports section.

Remember, this is one fan's opinion, and please ... no wagering.

So here we go ...

First round

1. Soccer fans vs 16. Redskins name change people

The people who want the NFL's Washington entry to change its name should be a 16 seed, given that the name is pretty racist, so it's hard to complain that they're too bitchy. Soccer fans aren't a great No. 1 seed either, although I can see a certain indie-band fan vibe among some of them in that they think only the cool, sophisticated people "get it."

I don't see soccer fans going all the way, but I'm not ready to go Harvard-Stanford women yet.

Winner: Soccer fans

8. Boston Red Sox fans vs. 9. NBA basketbloggers

I'm a Yankees fan who lives 15 miles from Boston. Who do you think I'm picking? (Side note, Yankees fans aren't in the tourney because they and Dallas Cowboys fans are dismissed "your standard asshole bandwagon fans." Who has more bandwagon fans than the Boston Red Sox?)

Winner: Boston Red Sox fans

5. Boxing fans vs. 12. MLS fans (distinct from soccer)

Oh, MLS fans, getting their hopes up one day only to have them crushed. They want so bad for their little indie band to make it big. Every tournament has to have its 12 beating a 5, so here you go.

Winner: MLS fans

4. Duke fans vs. 13 Notre Dame fans

This is the annual "committee has a funny sense of humor" contests, but it's really not that close. After Syracuse got a call in the Carrier Dome, Duke fans were complaining about not getting a call.

Let me repeat that ... Duke fans were complaining about not getting a call.

Winner: Duke fans

6. St. Louis Cardinals fans vs. 11. Kobe Bryant fans

From the Deadspin description

"Currently the NBA's best player. RIGHT NOW. AT THIS MOMENT. Even when he's unable to play. Say the word 'Colorado.' Go on. I f---ing dare you."

That'll do.

Winner: Kobe Bryant fans

3. All hockey fans vs. 14. Penn State fans

I wasn't kidding when I wrote that the Paterno dead-enders need to let it go. This isn't a 14 beating a 3; this is a 14 beating a 3 ... by 40.

Winner: Penn State fans

7. Lacrosse players vs. 10. Oakland Raiders fans

Deadspin described lacrosse "as a sport for rich preppy dipshits." Not from my experience. In college, lacrosse players were pretty much the campus psychos, which I say with equal parts fear and admiration. As for Raiders fans, I speak of them with equal parts fear and dislike for their team.

Winner: Oakland Raiders fans

2. Mixed martial arts fans vs. 15. Sabermetricians

I'm still trying to make peace with sabermetricians.

Winner: Mixed martial arts fans

Second round

1. Soccer fans vs. 8. Boston Red Sox fans

Only one of these groups of people loves to remind the world of everyone else's PED use (especially if they wear pinstripes in New York) while ignoring transgressions in their own house.

@LastHonestSport I'll correct it. Send me the link explaining exactly what he too and how long he took it. Thanks.
— Pete Abraham (@PeteAbe) December 15, 2013

And that guy's not a fan ... he's a writer.

Winner: Red Sox fans

4. Duke fans vs. 12. MLS fans

Coach K never gives the officials a hard time. Just ask Duke fans; they'll tell you.

Winner: Duke fans

11. Kobe Bryant fans vs. 14 Penn State fans

The people who think they are the real victims of the Jerry Sandusky scandal cruise to another victory.

Winner: Penn State fans

2. MMA fans vs. 10. Raiders fans

The winners might be too beat up to continue.

Winner: Raiders fans

Semifinals

4. Duke fans vs. 8. Red Sox fans

This could be a pay-per-view main event anywhere in the country, but Duke fans have never questioned my sanity.

Winner: Red Sox fans

10. Raiders fans vs. 14. Penn State fans

"Our football coach got fired because he didn't do anything about the child molester on campus? Let's riot!"

Winner: Penn State fans

Finals

8. Red Sox fans vs. 14. Penn State fans

It should be obvious I don't think much of Red Sox fans. I find them to be bandwagon-jumpers ("lifelong fan since 2004, baby!") who literally think there's something wrong with Yankees fans.

However ...

The whole tournament is built on generalizations, and is pretty tongue-in-cheek. Not all Red Sox fans are obnoxious, and neither are all Duke fans, Kobe fans, MLS fans or any other fans. I even have a lot of friends who root for the Red Sox, and they all insist they never, eeeeevvvveeerrrr chanted "Jeter sucks."

And obviously, many, many ... most Penn State fans are horrified about what happened. Any right-thinking person would be. But that there are any Penn State fans who are any less than horrified gives them the "distinction" of being the worst sports fans in America.

Winner: The idiots among Penn State fans

Confessions of a bad fan

So ... some stuff happened in the Yankees-Red Sox game last night.



This nutter from Joe Giradi is one of the best I've ever seen. Joe
Torre would have sat on his behind and hoped the power of his
calm would make everything stop.

From that moment on, I wanted the Yankees to get even, even if it meant CC Sabathia would have been immediately thrown out, thanks to the stupid way umpires implement the warning rule, which has the effect of giving one team a free shot ... or two, or three, or four.

CC, don't waste your ejection on some scrub. See if you can hit one of Ortiz's needle marks. Plenty of targets! #Yankees #RedSox
— LastHonestSportsFan (@LastHonestSport) August 19, 2013

I've made my thoughts on David Ortiz known more than once (and had a heated chat with my Red Sox fan mother-in-law about it over lunch yesterday), so I'll spare another rant. Instead, I'll leave it to The Captain's Blog.

I'd love to know what Ortiz thinks when he sees how Arod is treated. Wonder if "there but for the grace of the media go I" crosses his mind.
— The Captain's Blog (@williamnyy23) August 19, 2013

I shouldn't be proud of wanting to see a player I don't like on a team I don't like getting hit by a pitch and being upset when it didn't happen. (Even though I understand there really was no right time during the rest of the game to do it, I'm a believer that if you wait until the "right time," that time may never come up.)

But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part was when, during the middle of the game, I turned to Mrs. Last Honest and said ...

"I don't even care if the Yankees win this game. I just want to see Ortiz get hit." 

Yes, I prioritized retaliation over winning a game, a game that would have won a series over the Yankees' bitter rivals, at a time of the season when the Yankees need every win they can get. Mrs. Last Honest didn't really say much of anything, but I could tell by the look on her face that she thought I had lost my mind.

And I kind of had. In that moment, I became the guy I hate, the guy I wrote about at the end of the game, when the Yankees were on their way to victory.

Just so you know, #RedSox fans won't care if they lose this game. A-Rod got drilled. That's all that matters. #Yankees
— LastHonestSportsFan (@LastHonestSport) August 19, 2013

I'll try to be better next time.

Why I defend Alex Rodriguez

My pals Pizz and Gardner were having a few yuks-yuks about this morning's story on Deadspin regarding Alex Rodriguez being able to turn anything he touches into crap, or what I call the Sadim touch (it's Midas backwards). From the article:

"Could an athlete have been in a worse (non-murder division) situation than A-Rod found himself when he woke up this morning? He wants nothing more than to be adored and admired for his talent and he is The Worst Person Who Ever Lived as far as most people in and around baseball are concerned. The sport he loves is trying to kick him out for the rest of his life."

As the world prepares itself for an A-Rod suspension with a fervor that I can only compare with being near physical arousal, I frequently find myself defending him, not from the potential charges against him (although I can't wait to see Major League Baseball defend a suspension in front of an arbitrator or in court), but against the vitriol spewed his way.

On the day Aaron Hernandez appeared in court, Alex Rodriguez has been cast in the role of the greatest villain in sports.
— The Captain's Blog (@williamnyy23) July 24, 2013

Now why would I do such a crazy thing?

First, I'll confess, it's because he's a Yankee. Now, I won't reflexively defend every Yankee over everything, but my first instinct is to take the side of one of their players. (And along with that, I continue to be infuriated that David Ortiz remains celebrated to this day; it's kind of a thing with me.)

But it's not just that. It's that I don't feel the "punishment" fits the "crime."

@AnthonyDiMoro good lets see that narcissistic prick punk out of there.
— Alonzo Spencer (@TheAlSpencer) July 24, 2013

I'm not saying I kicked the crap out of him for that, but he blocked me to make me stop.

I have no illusions about Alex Rodriguez. He's a narcissist. He's an admitted steroid user, and may have done a lot more performance-enhancing drugs than what we know about. He was at least accused of cheating on his former wife. Of course, this makes him different than ... how many people in MLB clubhouses? The fact that Madonna may have been one of his paramours? (Then again, it's Madonna, so maybe not.)

But does he ever have a way of screwing things up! I'd list as many as I could remember, but Sports Illustrated did a nice job of chronicling some of his not-so-greatest moments, although I'm still not sure why anyone should be embarrassed about one of the most-famous actresses in Hollywood feeding him on national TV during the Super Bowl, and I'm not even a Cameron Diaz fan.

So sure, he's a dope. He does one dumb thing after another. But are there any stories about him being mean, like Barry Bonds? Yet he's treated like Bonds, and only slightly better than Michael Vick or Aaron Hernandez. I do think people are willing to admit he never ran a dog-fighting ring or allegedly killed someone ... if you insist.

I've always thought the biggest problem with his personality relates to the Deadspin article ... that he cares so much about his image, and is lousy at cultivating it. The opposite example (of course) is Derek Jeter, who I would say is as image-conscious as A-Rod, but without the capacity for idiocy, which engenders him a lot of goodwill. Seriously, would Rodriguez ever have gotten away with this?

As I wrote previously, I think it all starts with the Texas contract, and everything since then has been shot through the prism of him being a bad guy by people who are angry about it. It's so bad that one of the other pieces of the A-Rod canon is that he refused a trade to the Red Sox, even though it's not true (it was the union that blocked it) and he has never gotten credit for moving to third when he was traded to the Yankees, even though he was a better shortstop than Jeter.

For the last word on the topic, I'll leave you with Will Leitch.

Alex Rodriguez is too dumb, self-absorbed and self-destructive to go away. This is sort of a reason to root for him. http://t.co/cJxaYQ5OKZ
— Will Leitch (@williamfleitch) July 25, 2013

The trap Alex Rodriguez should avoid

Thanks to Buster Olney, I learned this morning that Bob Klapisch was concern-trolling about Alex Rodriguez, writing that if Alex Rodriguez really loves baseball, he would just confess about steroids and Biogenesis. (Given the use of quotation marks in Klapisch's tweet linking to the column, I'm inclined to believe he thinks A-Rod is full of it ... surprise, surprise, surprise.)

On A-Rod and his "love" for the game. http://t.co/3wz26qMYW4
— Bob Klapisch (@BobKlap) July 21, 2013

To Klapisch, and anyone who agrees with him, I say "Screw that" and "Why should he?"

If Alex Rodriguez sat down with a reporter tomorrow and came clean about everything -- the steroids between 2001 and 2003, anything he might have done since then, Biogenesis, all of it -- would it help him? Would baseball fans and media say, "Wow, that Alex Rodriguez is really a stand-up guy! Good for him! I hope Bud Selig takes it easy on him now."

Ummmm...no.

Alex Rodriguez will continue to the the pure embodiment of All That Is Wrong With Baseball, which he has been not since he admitted to taking steroids, but since he had the unmitigated gall to sign the contract that Tom Hicks offered him in 2000.

Unlike someone like Andy Pettitte or Jason Giambi -- who Klapisch cited as a role model for Rodriguez to follow, conveniently forgetting that Giambi's saving grace was not the admission, but people liking him -- between the steroids, the amazing ability to step on whatever rake he can find (this being but one example) and his postseason troubles (see below), he is hated enough so that his reputation will never recover.

As for a-rod's readiness, he appears to be in postseason form. today 3 strikeouts in 4 at-bats
— Jon Heyman (@JonHeymanCBS) July 21, 2013

Remember, this is a guy who got ripped by his own team for saying he was ready to play games again.

Visit from Dr. Kelly over the weekend, who gave me the best news - the green light to play games again! http://t.co/RuzfXOJjHI
— Alex Rodriguez (@AROD) June 25, 2013

I also found this note in Klapisch's column revealing.

"In his heart, however, A-Rod knows exactly why Selig is obsessed with excising him. It’s because Rodriguez was once christened as the game’s savior, clean and hardworking, the very medicine baseball needed after Barry Bonds ensured the game’s Holy Grail – the all-time home run record – was fraudulent."

And if you think that's just my opinion and people will forgive Rodriguez if he just admits to what he did, let me remind you that he did it once before, and it got him nowhere.

Meanwhile, you have Ken Rosenthal carrying on the idiocy that people really shouldn't judge David Ortiz for having been on the list of players testing positive for performance-enhancing drugs in 2003, a benefit of the doubt that no one on the list has gotten because Ortiz is well-liked.

Re: Ortiz. Tested positive at time when there were no penalties for PEDs. Tests were supposed to be confidential. I view him less harshly.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 20, 2013

Folks, I know I may be splitting hairs on Ortiz. He never admitted to PED use, unlike some others. Just view his circumstances as different.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 20, 2013

Let me rephrase that: Ortiz did not admit to intentional PED use. And players were less vigilant then, with no penalties in place.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 20, 2013

Last thing on Ortiz: I respect all opinions on this. Hard to know what is right, what is wrong. I don’t pretend to have all the answers.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 21, 2013

Why Ortiz’s positive test and others in 2003 cannot be viewed as definitive. It’s complicated, but read this story. http://t.co/cc5942qAU1
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 21, 2013

Again, I respect everyone’s opinions. But there were issues with 2003 list that could not be explained in 140 characters. Story helps.
— Ken Rosenthal (@Ken_Rosenthal) July 21, 2013

I have an idea. Alex Rodriguez should confess what he did (again, by the way) when David Ortiz confesses to what he did.

Which means it will never happen.

Dreaming of a Jeter comeback

I had an awesome dream last night. You want to hear about it?

Of course you do.

Cue the harps.

I'm flipping through the Twitter machine, checking a little news, a little sports, the big U.S. Senate election here in Massachusetts yesterday.

And then I saw it, with a picture and everything, from Derek Jeter himself:

"Visit from Dr. Kelly over the weekend, who gave me the best news -- the green light to play games again!"

Wow! If that's true, it's awesome. Jayson Nix has done a nice job at shortstop in Jeter's absence, but still, this is Derek Jeter ... star, captain, talisman. (Why, yes, I do let English soccer terms slip into my dreams. Why do you ask?)

So I keep reading, and there's Yankees GM Brian Cashman confirming the news. Jeter would probably start his rehab stint in Tampa, first as designated hitter, then moving to shortstop. If all went well, he'd move up to Trenton for a few games, and then Scranton. Barring any setbacks, he might be back in the Yankees' lineup in a couple weeks, maybe even for the Twins series the weekend before the All-Star Break.

During the Yankees TV broadcast, Michael Kay and the gang are naturally stoked, and John Sterling is absolutely out of his tree on the radio. I'm pretty sure he even missed a catchphrase or two.

After the game, Jeter is all anyone wants to talk to Joe Girardi about, even though the Yankees won on a walkoff homer by Ichiro.


My fellow Yankees fans are also going nuts, knowing that the main man could be back before too much longer.

"Maybe this is the start," I think. "Jeter comes back, then A-Rod, then Granderson, then maybe Teixeira (spoiler alert: no). They've been pitching well, and if that keeps up ... ."

Katy Perry's "Wide Awake" comes on. No, I haven't asked Mrs. Last Honest if she chose it as her alarm for that reason.

Wow, that was quite a dream. It was like the dreams I still have a few times a year where I'm convinced I have a term paper due the next day, and I have to wake up to remember I haven't had any term papers due since 1996.

That tweet from Jeter seemed so ... real.

The meaning of Donnie Baseball

When Don Mattingly brought his Dodgers to Yankee Stadium last week to face the Yankees, he got the obvious reaction -- a hero's welcome from both the team and the fans.

As Yankees legends go, Mattingly's career didn't reach the same gaudy heights as others -- unless he pulls a Joe Torre and becomes a highly successful manager, he won't make the Hall of Fame (thanks, injuries), and his only postseason experience was a losing series against Seattle when the Yankees were the 1995 wildcard -- but he is beloved by Yankees fans, particularly those of a certain age ...

... like me, in my early 40s. It's no accident that his retired number is my Twitter avatar.

For us, rooting the the Yankees during the Mattingly years meant supporting a team that was sometimes good, sometimes bad, sometimes awful, but never quite good enough until 1994 and the strike and 1995 and the fifth game against Seattle and 1996 with Tino Martinez playing first base. The Yankees' Wikipedia page actually has a section called "Struggles: The Mattingly Years (1982-1995)."

It meant seeing unbelievable greatness and an unfair decline, betrayed by a body that could no longer do what it did before.

But during that time, Mattingly was our guy. As wave upon wave of players came and went, he was there, giving all he had, even if was only good and not the great of his early years. Yet we remembered those early years, and we rejoiced at the reminders of them.



After Mattingly retired, the Yankees started a new dynasty, and we loved the heroes of those teams: Tino, Bernie Williams, Paul O'Neill, David Wells, Andy Pettitte, Mariano Rivera and Derek Jeter. But before any of those guys, there was Don Mattingly.

And we'll always love him for it.

Joba's not wrong just because he's Joba and Mariano's Mariano

Perhaps you've heard about the little dustup in Yankee-land yesterday between Mariano Rivera and Joba Chamberlain. The short version is that Mariano was doing an interview in the dugout, Joba was chatting kind of loudly near the dugout, Mariano asked Joba to pipe down, Joba took exception.

In truth, they probably both could have handled it better. Maybe Mariano could have grabbed Joba privately after all was said and done and explained that he was talking about an emotional meeting he had with families earlier in the day. Perhaps Joba could have said, "Sorry, I didn't realize I was messing up your interview" when Mariano first brought it up and quieted down or moved a little further away.

But from what I have read, the whole incident is Joba's fault because who was involved, and some of the comments on the Daily News piece linked above are classless, particularly the "send him back to the reservation" (Joba is a Native American) and referring to his family as "fat pigs in wheelchairs" ones, although someone did point out that it's pretty low to make fun of his father's polio.

On the one hand, you have Mariano Rivera, one of the classiest and rightfully most-respected players in baseball. If the guy has ever put a foot wrong in public, I can't remember it off the top of my head. He even resisted the urge to tell the entire city of Boston to perform certain anatomically impossible acts when they gave him a standing ovation for blowing two saves in the 2004 ALCS.  

On the other hand, you have Joba Chamberlain, he of the drunk driving charge, the trampoline-related injury ... and the disappointing career in pinstripes.

So, obviously, people are going to take Mariano's side, regardless of who was right and who was wrong.  I had two discussions on Twitter this morning based around that line of thinking, and you can read a blog post from one of the people I was conversing with here.

I know I'm in the minority on this one. Oh well.

Sports on vacation

WELCOME, N.C. -- While Mrs. Last Honest and I were on vacation in the Carolinas last week, I was chatting with the woman behind the desk at the Richard Childress Racing Museum as she was ringing up my purchases, a Dale Earnhardt shirt and two Kevin Harvick die-casts, one of which was autographed, for $20 each ... score!

During our conversation, she mentioned there were people who complained about the $12 admission price.

This isn't the dumbest thing I've ever heard, but it was probably the dumbest thing I heard that day. If you go to the museum, among the things you will see are:

* both of RCR's Daytona 500-winning cars.

* Harvick's car that won in Atlanta three races after Earnhardt died in 2001.

* video of the end of all three of those races, as well as others.

* all of Earnhardt's special paint schemes for the Winston all-star race.

* the car Harvick won his first Busch (now Nationwide) series title with, including the tires he destroyed doing his post-race burnout.

* cars from Childress' racing career.

* other memorabilia from Childress' career.

* a representation of Earnhardt's old shop, which is where the museum is located.

And once you're done with that, you can visit the new shop around the back, where you can watch crew members work on the current cars.

All in all, it's a bargain at twice the price.

What Dale Earnhardt fan wouldn't pay $12 just to see this?

 * * * * *

CHARLOTTE, N.C. -- Any guess what this is?

Yes, someone use to drive this.

It's the remnants of this, Geoff Bodine's truck crash in 2000, which he somehow survived. 

What's left of Bodine's truck is part of the "WRECKS!" display at the NASCAR Hall of Fame. The whole museum provides an impressive history of NASCAR, but the temporary display from some of the sport's most-spectacular crashes, along with a video that plays along with the exhibit, is guaranteed to get your attention. It's a wonder the drivers survived all of them.

If you look carefully, you can see where Mike Harmon was sitting when this happened ...

* * * * *

FORT MILL, S.C. -- Last year, Freddy Garcia was pitching in Yankee Stadium.

Last week, he was pitching in front of a crowd generously listed as 1,377 for the Norfolk Tides against a Charlotte Knights team that not only doesn't play in its home city, until BB&T Ballpark opens next year, doesn't even play in its home state.  

When plans to meet with a college friend of mine fell through, Mrs. Last Honest suggested taking the short trip across the South Carolina border to the game. It was actually a pretty depressing scene, between the tiny crowd and the home team getting blown out. In about the third inning, a bunch of people who I believe had been tailgating came and sat behind us, and while they were pretty obnoxious, they and the guy in our section who randomly yelled "baseball" in a Southern drawl that made it sound like "base-bawl" provided most of the entertainment.

But we got front-row seats behind home plate for $15, and it was neat to see Garcia pitch. At this stage of his career, he pretty much throws slop, and when it's not working, he can get pounded. (I certainly saw enough of that with the Yankees.) But when it does work, he knows what he's doing out there, and can get major league hitters out.

I'm surprised he's not a fifth starter or long reliever for some big league club, and I have a feeling he will be soon.

Don't worry, Freddy. It shouldn't be much longer now.

* * * * *

CHARLESTON, S.C. -- Ever since baseball became part of my life, I have always hated rain. 

When I was a kid, rain meant I couldn't play. As an adult, rain means I can't watch. At least when I'm home, if it's raining on the game I want to watch, I can watch another one or something else. But when I'm at the ballpark, all rain does is make me mad.

So after a week of mostly perfect weather, of course it rained the night I wanted to see the Yankees' Class A Charleston RiverDogs take on the West Virginia Power. It started raining when we got the ballpark, and it rained at the 7:05 start time, and it rained, and it rained a little more. And given that the forecast for later in the night called for more rain, I wasn't feeling encouraged.

You never want to see this at the ballpark.

But then it stopped raining. The grounds crew took the tarp off, and they started playing baseball.

And Mrs. Last Honest and I never went to our seats.

During the rain delay, we, like a lot of other fans, hung out upstairs by the picnic tables where it was dry. After the game started, I went to check on our seats, but no amount of paper towels could dry them off, so we stayed where we were. The nice thing about Joseph P. Riley Jr. Park ("The Joe" for short) is that it's small enough so that sitting by the picnic tables isn't too far away.

Not a bad view, and it was dry.

The night didn't start well, but other than Charleston losing, it wound up not being too bad.

Thoughts of Boston ... a week later

There's a woman who works in my office a couple days a week when it's more convenient for her than working in her own office. She has a desk that she uses, and we like having her around.

So it was a little odd when I heard her sounding a bit harried on the phone last Monday, to the point where she seemed pretty upset. At the same time, I happened to be checking out Twitter when I saw the headline ...

... There had been explosions at the Boston Marathon.

* * * * *

Not to get all Kevin Bacon, but as much as the Boston Marathon is obviously both a Boston event (they even hold it as part of a local holiday, Patriots' Day) and now one of the world's major marathons, it's a local event in almost all of the cities and towns in Massachusetts because most everyone is within a few degrees of someone who runs it. The closest I ever came was the year a co-worker of mine ran. It's also the only year I've followed the marathon all that closely, because I wanted to see how she was doing.

There was the woman running to raise money for the local hospital where she had surgery the year before, and the cop who ran in support of a local cancer patient.

And there was my sometime office-mate, whose sister's boyfriend was running.

Those were the people, and their families, and their friends, and their co-workers, who the bombers were after. They weren't just attacking the marathon; they were attacking us.

The explosions not only killed three and injured scores of others (a MIT police officer was also killed in a shootout with the suspects), but they frightened everyone and set off a series of frantic phone calls and text messages all across the state. All the people I've mentioned and their families were OK; obviously, many people were not.

And not only does almost everyone in Massachusetts have some connection to the marathon, lots of people know someone in or near Boston. It would have never occurred to me that anyone would have thought Mrs. Last Honest or I were in danger, since my office is 15 to 20 miles away, and my wife's work, which is near the marathon route, was closed for the holiday. (Side note: I won't be giving her grief about Patriots' Day for a while.)

But when I got home, there were messages on my Facebook page from a couple of my high school friends asking if we were OK, so I not only assured them that we were fine, I posted a general message saying we were fine.

But again, too many people didn't get to say that.

* * * * *

I'm not sure if there are two major American cities (I said major, so sit down Tuscaloosa and Auburn, AL) as defined by a sporting rivalry as much as New York and Boston, especially on the Boston end. Maybe Manchester and Liverpool, Madrid and Barcelona or another soccer rivalry elsewhere in the world can make that claim, but I don't know if it exists here.

So that's why, even though all the expressions of support after the bombing were heartfelt and sincere, I think they meant a bit extra coming from New York, because it was the home of the Yankees reaching out to the home of the Red Sox.

And then the Yankees decided to play "Sweet Caroline." As far as audible tributes from one city to another, one fanbase to another goes, it was hard to top.


As a Yankees fan who lives near Boston, I could hardly have been prouder of my team.

* * * * *

I'm not a big fan of Rene Rancourt, the Boston Bruins' national anthem singer. His enthusiasm and love for what he does is unmatched, but I just don't think he's that good a singer.

However, when I tuned in to the first Bruins game after the bombing, I figured Rancourt would deliver a stemwinder of a national anthem and pump his fist about 16 times, and I'd be OK with that. If ever a situation called for it, it was this one.

What he did though, was so much cooler. And he got how important it was.

* * * * *

I'm writing this from a hotel room in Concord, NC, where my wife and I are on vacation. (In another side note, we were in San Diego when Whitey Bulger was captured and in Asheville, NC, when Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was arrested for his alleged role in the marathon bombing. If authorities are looking to make an arrest in the Gardner Museum heist, Mrs. Last Honest and I have a hankering to go to London.)

So I missed David Ortiz's speech at Fenway.

I am not ... let me repeat, AM NOT ... a David Ortiz fan. But his speech? Perfect, f-bomb and all.

* * * * *

I think that people who write and talk about sports tend to give them too much credit. The Saints winning the Super Bowl didn't fix New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina. The Yankees going to the World Series didn't heal all of the pain after 9/11, and the Tigers weren't going to save Detroit during the auto crisis.

And there's no number of "Sweet Caroline" or national anthem singalongs or anything else at a sporting event that will heal the wounded bodies or souls in Boston, although I would love to see some type of event where the runner who didn't get to finish the marathon could cross the finish line.

But do sports help in some way? Maybe because it happened so close to where I live, I've realized more than ever that they can.

Youk to the Yanks? Why not?

Ken Tremendous had this to say on the Twitter machine yesterday.

@KenTremendous The great thing about Youk to the Yankees is imagining how much both Sox fans and Yankees fans would hate it.

So yes, it appears that the Yankees have some interest in signing Kevin Youkilis to play third base while Alex Rodriguez is out after knee surgery. And while Ken may be thinking that Red Sox fans would hate it because Youkilis is a Yankee while Yankees fans may hate it because Youk is over the hill, I'm going to guess he meant Yankees fans would hate the idea of him in their uniform.

To get a highly unscientific feel of how my fellow Yankees fans feel about the possibility, I consulted the Yankees Facebook page I follow, and these were some of the comments. (False equivalency alert -- I did not count to see how many of the 644 comments were pro-Youkilis or anti-Youkilis. I'm only listing certain comments to show that there were people who liked or disliked the idea.)

 "Good player .I think he would be a good fit."

"Even though he is a former Blow Sux, he is a gamer and would help while A-rod is on the mend. Look at what former Red Sox have done for us in the past."

"Might have to quit watching for first time ever..........besides he's old and mean"

"no!no!no!no! My most hated Red Sox player!!! Nooooooooo!"

There were also a couple people who like the idea because Youkilis is Jewish, which immediately made me think of this.


So how do I feel? It's pretty simple.If Youkilis can help the team, I hope the Yankees sign him. If not, I hope they don't.

I couldn't care less if Youkilis played for the Red Sox. I accepted Roger Clemens. I accepted Wade Boggs. I accepted Johnny Damon. A couple years ago, Mrs. Last Honest asked me how I would feel if Jonathan Papelbon signed with the Yankees. I told her I'd learn how to dance a jig.


The one Red Sox player who I could never have abided as a Yankee was Jason Varitek. There's no way I could have tolerated a man beloved in Boston for a cheap shot being in pinstripes.

Other than that, it doesn't matter who someone played for before New York. I only care about what they do in New York.

The experience of being there

The other night, my friend Pizz wrote this on Facebook:

"The emotional connection man has to sport is just one of those things. It's the reason why, every time I go to Fenway Park I feel like a six-year-old seeing the Green Monster for the first time. And it's the reason why Adam Richman takes a moment away from eating 100 oz cheeseburgers and visiting his favorite English club and tears up.

I'm building up a knowledge and love of Everton and someday when I make my way (to) Liverpool, I'll probably have the same US in the UK moment."

I went to Yankee Stadium for the first time when I was 8 years old. I wish I could remember how I felt when I walked into the ballpark, but I can't. I do remember it was a bus trip, that we sat in the upper deck, that Doug Bird pitched for the Yankees, that a Royals player hit a home run off the foul pole (based on this box score, which I think is the right one, it would have been Clint Hurdle) and most importantly, Reggie Jackson hit one out.

I've seen a lot of sporting venues since then, mostly for games, but also on tours or walking through whatever open doors happened to present themselves, including the time I took a left turn and found myself on the darkened court at Cameron Indoor Stadium. The moment that always strikes me is when I step inside the field, court or racetrack, and the scene opens up in front of me.

It's the new Yankee Stadium, and I'm a lot older.

 

 

My first (and so far, only) time at Camden Yards. I was in awe. It was everything I was told it would be, and more.

Yet I find the stronger connections are when I can attach a place to something in particular, like when Mrs. Last Honest and I visited Lake Placid not quite two months ago. The connection isn't always a magical one, however, like realizing the Vancouver Olympic speed skating oval was in the back of a business park or the ice skating arena was tucked between a residential neighborhood and an amusement park.

There's probably a good reason why NBC stuck to indoor shots when they cut to figure skating.

But I find the strongest connection with objects; they bring what I saw, listened to or read about to life. I've lost the picture to various computer changes, but it was amazing to see the actual car that Dale Earnhardt won the 1998 Daytona 500 with at the Richard Childress Racing museum. I watched that race on television, barely able to sit the last few laps until he came to the final caution and I knew he would finally win the race.

It's the reason why I'm such a geek for the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. It's baseball history, right there, including the Dave Righetti no-hitter from July 4, 1983, that I was listening to on the radio and left to do something else, even though I knew he was throwing a no-hitter. (What can I say? Sometimes I'm an idiot.)

I still kick myself for leaving to this day.

Pizz is looking forward to going to Liverpool someday to see Goodison Park, although I, of course, would have him see Anfield on the proper, red side of Merseyside (something I'd like to do myself someday). Of places I haven't seen other than Anfield, the first three that come to mind that I'd like to see from the inside are the Rose Bowl, the Los Angeles Coliseum and Madison Square Garden.

But one thing about sports is that no matter the venue, no matter the time, no matter the event, something can happen that creates a memory for a lifetime, a permanent connection, when you least expect it.

How to fix Alex Rodriguez

Alex Rodriguez's life hasn't been great lately -- not hitting, benched, rumored to have been trying to score with a female fan during a game (to which I say, dude, your girlfriend looks like this ... stop) and perhaps headed to Miami.

However, if he wants it, I have a way to make things better for him. I can't fix his swing, but I can fix his image.

The first thing he needs to do is pick a cause, and no, "Alex Rodriguez" doesn't count. He hasn't had to face down a deadly disease, but I'm sure there is something near and dear to his heart.

Secondly, he needs to find some way to symbolize this cause, something that says to everyone, "I support what Alex Rodriguez is doing."

Then he needs to publicly raise tons and tons of money, preferably something in the hundreds of millions of dollars, to make real headway toward whatever he's trying to do.

He also has to understand there will be critics. After all, he's not a particularly popular guy (hence my need to give him advice on improving his image), and he did use steroids. But here's the great thing about being the man behind a cause that makes tons of money (and if he does get traded to Miami, and the Marlins beat the hated Yankees in the World Series, so much the better) ... if he does that, the drugs and perceived personality flaws can be explained away with "Everybody did it!" and "Look at all the good he did!"

You're welcome, Alex.

I'm a Yankees fan. If you don't like that, too damn bad.

By virtue of where I've lived for nearly 10 years, I've grown used to people questioning my sanity when it comes to the baseball team I root for.

However within recent days, I've learned that Yankees fans are horrible people...

@king_kaufman "I wish there was a stat for most boos for a team that keeps playing in October." Smoltz nails those horrible Yankee fans.

@LastHonestSport @king_kaufman Why are they horrible? They've seen their homer-only team blow scoring chances all year!

@king_kaufman The Yankees could go 162-0, @LastHonestSport, and the fans would boo every time one of them strikes out with runners on 

@LastHonestSport @king_kaufman No they wouldn't. It's the failing over and over that makes them boo.

 ... that Michael Rosenberg feels are incapable of feeling joy ...

I understand why people cheer for the Yankees. (The usual reasons: They grew up in New York, their parents did, they love the uniforms, etc.) I understand why the Yankees spend so much money. (They have it, and they want to win.)
I just don't understand how anybody gets joy out of it anymore.
And I don't think they are.

... and the Yankees are, apparently, al-Qaeda ...

@Will_Bunch The Yankees (terrorists) are dead, and Detroit (GM) is alive #BaseballCampaignSlogan

 ... whose fans are also into heartless killing ...

@EdgeofSports Rooting for the Yankees is like rooting for the hunter who killed Bambi's mom.

I'm starting to think I either need to go to therapy or start drinking.

Let me be painfully and abundantly clear on this. I have been a Yankees fan my whole life, and I'll be one until the day I die. I'm from New York, from a family full of Yankees fans. I can't tell you how many hours I've spent at my grandfather's kitchen table talking about the Yankees. (We used to complain that Dave Winfield hit meaningless home runs back when Alex Rodriguez was in junior high school, and he always referred to Jim Leyritz as "Ley-re-witz")

We didn't have cable or satellite for most of the time when I was growing up, so it was exciting when one of the local TV stations picked up the WPIX games when I was younger.When they weren't on TV, I would carefully adjust the dial on my radio to get the games.

I remember the (especially by Yankees standards) lean years of the 1980s and early 1990s, when Don Mattingly was just about the only thing worth watching, and I celebrated when the Kingdome was blown up because of the 1995 playoffs.

When the Yankees won the World Series in 1996, I called my best friend from high school to celebrate, and in 2003, the last time I saw him alive was watching the Yankees against the Red Sox in the playoffs.

Yes, King, I get mad when the Yankees play like crap, and Mike, winning makes me feel somewhere between pleased and delirious. And I get that I'm lucky to root for a wealthy, successful team that is going to make me happy more often that not, but I'm getting sick and tired of people assuming the worst in me because that's the team I root for.

I'm a good person. I love my family, feel incredibly lucky to have Mrs. Last Honest in my life and cherish my friends. I work hard and try to treat people well.

I'm also a New York Yankees fan.

And if that bothers you somehow ... the problem is with you, not me.

Ken Harrelson is the most-biased announcer ... duh!

So the folks at the Wall Street Journal decided to do themselves a little study, and determined that Chicago White Sox TV broadcasts are the most-biased in Major League Baseball, largely because of Ken "Hawk" Harrelson.

They might as well have booked me to fight both Klitschko brothers in the same day, because the result would be as much of a foregone conclusion.


But the worst part isn't even that Harrelson is biased. It's that he's terrible. Maybe because I was young and stupid and didn't know any better, but I swear he was better doing Yankees games in the late 1980s and the White Sox in the 1990s with Tom Paciorek. He probably was just as biased, but he was entertaining and actually provided knowledge about the game.

Now, however, the game is basically ways to fill time between "Stretch!" "You can put it on the board ... YES!" "He gone" and other set pieces.






The chart isn't the easiest to read (copying off a webpage isn't the easiest), but tied there in the seventh spot are Nationals announcers Bob Carpenter and F.P. Santangelo. I saw some games between the Phillies and Nationals earlier this year, plus the interleague series with the Yankees, and I didn't really detect much bias ... although that may have been because I was wondering how anyone so incompetent could be allowed in a broadcast booth.

And there at the bottom are the Yankees broadcast team of Michael Kay and his cast of thousands and the Red Sox team of Jerry Remy and Don Orsillo. In spite of my own personal Yankees bias, it's a fair ranking. Orsillo and Remy usually give a straightforward, honest call (Dennis Eckersley in the studio is a bonus), and the Yankees crew does the same. I actually find them a bit bland at times. Maybe they have to be to make up for John Sterling, who is biased, horrible and anything but bland in the radio booth.